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Abandoned Bandwagon

by Philip Bosley

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1.
Touch & Go 03:58
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Staring at a screen, staring at a phone Listening to the heavy winds outside the window Everyone is looking forward to moving on But everything is still touch and go Pass the hours watching the daily numbers Like a real-life round of chutes and ladders Worldwide Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Praying like it matters Watching things unravel, feeling aged and aghast Petrified of progress, still living in the past Try to keep it all together as it flies apart Should've done better, should've known from the start Heaviest weight on the lightest branch An inner monologue with an avalanche Sitting here with your worst fears running on demand Standing exposed on an empty bandstand
2.
All For Naught 03:02
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Fading beauty who's lost the plot Burdens in your head like a juggernaut Coffee grounds from the bottom of the pot Sketches of a derailed train of thought Tie yourself up in all these knots Fill the page, connect the dots Outcomes devoid of upshots It's one for all, and all for naught (1) Nothing to do but stand and watch Losers sigh at the victor's taunt Failed the lessons you weren't taught You get to win if you don't get caught Kudos paid as an afterthought Dying plants in a flower pot Watered too late to stop the rot Standing alone in a parking lot (2) Pay the price for all you've wrought Lost the prize you thought you'd sought Recompense that can't be bought Blinded right in the blind spot Cover your choked voice with a cough Nobody cares how long you fought Nothing to do but stand and watch And shake your head at how quickly they all forgot you
3.
Corporate Troubadour 03:47
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(It's a) Hell of a way to start the middle age A gilded cage is still a cage Dressed in malaise from head to toe All dolled up and nowhere to go Final page of this desperate despot's last attempts to obfuscate Like a twenty-first century Watergate Can't go back to where we were before The old saloon is now a New Age hippy store Like a corporate troubadour Poorly hidden matchbook, a burnt bridge contributor Sweeping proclamations from a half-baked amateur Bad jokes and bad faith lies, pornographic philosopher A next-gen, hell-bent high-paid conspiracy connoisseur With your abhorrent settled scores Just a corporate troubadour Lonesome laments in the hours after midnight Assurances are anything but airtight Does anyone still have the will to fight? The old left of center's leaning hard to the right It seems fear of exposure is no longer a deterrent Celebrate your newest holiday of disenfranchisement Prevarication misconstrued as endorsement Common courtesy needs some positive reinforcement In the fading candlelight Nothing's seems so bright anymore We've got a lot to answer for All these corporate troubadours
4.
Career Drinkers 03:09
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Part-timers and career drinkers Fallacies and falsehoods of liquor Bad feelings and bad times linger A chill inside, worse than any winter Shots on my breath on a night in October “You're less fun when you're sober” Condensation falling on my coaster Just take my name off your poster That off the shelf Irish whiskey Poured into my beers recklessly Behind the northern forest festival revelry I almost hung myself from a birch tree Get one more round, get carelessly legless I don't miss the crying, I don't miss the darkness And what's to show, after twenty-odd years? Scars on my soul, holes in my ears
5.
Tiffany Lamp 03:39
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Who knew this thing had a lifespan? Piling up like the dust on the nightstand Tiffany lamp, phone charger, elastic hairbands As all the control slips out of your hands Let your eyes adjust to the dark Make out the most of what you can Under the shell of a hardened man Extinguishing the spark You're fixating, but what else do you have? Bland and boring and dreary and drab Overthinking all your plans by the glow of a Tiffany Lamp As all control slips out of your hands A blurry haze, of endless days With your balance in decay Colours bleed to grey, what else is left to say? It was all that you had left, and they took it all away
6.
The Most Toys 04:22
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Settled into a moderate's armchair A black matter for the heart that sent you there Facing up to not being that brave Weights we all carry to the grave Burdens both splendid and spectacular Too timid to be a true ambassador Deny yourself of your one true joy For the sake of being one of the boys Fighting anxiety, fighting the boredom Watching your leaves change into autumn Put your feet up if they get too cold Ball up your worries and watch them implode Burdens of young kings foisted on old queens Fabulous dresses and gowns never seen Mail-order bridesmaid apparel deployed Trying to die with the most toys Does anyone ever really die a winner? Is it age or is it dust on the mirror? Truth is there's nothing out there to stop me It's within my reach, but I just won't let me Wore out my welcome with my superstitions Headfirst into failure like a man on a mission A babbling voice in my head to ignore Fighting an internalized cold war Burdens you can't remove, they're hardwired Halfway to halfway to halfway to retired Making a stand but it's all just so much noise Trying to die with the toys
7.
Tapestry 02:36
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Bored impatience of a laundromat Thinking selling all my Strats Seems like all I do is hurt Terrible choices for an introvert Self-absorbed despondency Hell-bent for mediocrity My composure is a travesty Watch it unravel like a tapestry Something from nothing once again Hello songs, my only friend Another lonely dirge is penned An assembly line of aches and pains Again
8.
All You Had To Do 03:16
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I wasn't asking for the world Just a little bit of help, my guy Seems I'm not good enough To even merit a reply But if you can't find the time Well gee whiz, just tell me so Y'know it's really not that hard... Dismissed and treated as a relic Contrite, but unapologetic All you had to do was say no All you had to do was say no Still pushing hard to build yourself Guess I'm just not worth the time I'll bet my calls would be returned If you thought it'd help with your climb With a halfhearted brush-off reply Before you vanish like a ghost Nobody likes the silent types... And as you're reaching for the stars All your friends they'll wish you well Have a blast, and go to hell...
9.
Junkies & Drunks 03:54
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Find yourself out of touch and frustrated How quickly the new becomes the dated Chipping away at your nostalgia in chunks All of your heroes were junkies and drunks How fast your best will turn to worst Failing favours unrehearsed How fast your January sanctuary first Becomes a February curse Time is passing faster you must admit You can't help but find the time to waste it Chipping away at where you placed all your hopes All of your heroes are ghosts How fast will you be erased from this earth For all the nothing it was worth How fast your January final blessed curse Becomes a February first
10.
Broken Teapot 02:49
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Are your reserves set to expire? Are you afraid, sad and lonely and tired? Have all your worst fears been amplified? Do you feel like you're sitting, waiting to die? Has the story of your life gone and lost the plot? Just a stream of coffee and pills for a blood clot? A cooling tempest in a broken teapot? Or so I thought Are you nervous and edgy with no reason to be? Staring out of the window with nothing to see? Can't even find the wherewithal to want to believe? With no reprieve Anxieties bow-tied with a Gordian Knot? An endless echo with no way to stop it Burdens in song form sold in a gift shop That's overstocked
11.
You're Gonna Walk It Alone 05:17
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Could you do me a favour? Give me a moment to savour it Don't take the time to forget it Don't take my mind to regret it Slumbering and smouldering, Cautiously clamouring for it Shadows silhouetting it Aiding and abetting it You wanna walk that road? You're gonna walk it alone Edges worn, tempers frayed How much more can I give away? Everything is a crippling bore Can't even think straight anymore You make your own luck And I made mine terrible Old neglected aqueducts Self-sabotage was inevitable You wanna walk that road? You're gonna walk it alone Let's have all of the fun Before we get old Never figured we'd be so bold Learn all the things we were never told Cruising 'round town in a '79 Olds No one can tell us no, oh no Out of our minds, out of control Wrap it around that old telephone pole Learn all the things you were never gonna know Everything's gaudy and faded and cold Meeting our end in a '79 Olds You wanna walk that road? A mediocre portfolio As you flatline like a dial tone Yeah you make your own luck And I took mine to the grave There's nothing left to be found There's no one here to be saved Might seem kinda sad, but kinda inevitable You wanna walk that road? You're gonna walk it alone

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released April 4, 2023

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Philip Bosley Port Colborne, Ontario

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